Also, I couldn't resist these Michael Jackson jokes...

Q. Why did Michael Jackson phone Boyz-II-Men?
A. He thought it was a delivery service.

Q. Why can you always win a race with Michael Jackson?
A. Because he always likes to come in a little behind.

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to Gary Glitter?
A. I'll swap you a 10 for two fives

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"It's too bad, that along with all his troubles, Michael Jackson now has food poisoning."
"Really?"
"Yes - he ate a five year old wiener."
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Thanks to popbitch.